The Wimbledon tennis tournament is played at the All England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club. I am not a member. Is there a Partial England Tennis Club that would have me?

I am writing a book for my level of tennis: The Offensive Use of the Short Lob.

Executive privilege is incomprehensible.

Needed, but often reprehensible.

I recently shaved off the beard I had for the last three years. Some friends noticed and commented that I look younger. I don’t ask, “Than what?” Others see my face as changed but don’t know why and ask whether I got a haircut or new glasses. Some others ask if I have lost weight. I wish.

MY JOB IS

KEEPING FACES CLEAN

AND NOBODY KNOWS

DE STUBBLE

I’VE SEEN

BURMA-SHAVE                                                    

Many of us have many personal electronic gizmos—phones, tablets, watches, fitness and GPS devices—that need regular charging. Can’t they make them so the same charging cord could be used for all of them?

I heard a woman on her phone say, “He is self-aware of that.”

The op-ed headline asked, “How Should Christians have Sex?” The right answer is obvious: Missionary position.

Near the front step of the country house lay a dead, baby skunk. My mind reverted to old-world peasantry and wondered if this was some sort of message. If so, it failed. I neither knew what it meant nor who had sent it.

The crying, three-year-old girl said to her Dad, “I’d rather be invisible.”

A reason I am not a conservative: I am not inordinately afraid of or repulsed by people who do not appear to be just like me.

I am Donald J. Trump.

High I.Q I claim, but grump,

History’s not my forte.

Rebel’s had no airport?!

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